top of page
Search

How ADHD Presents in Females: Signs Women in Colorado Shouldn’t Ignore

Updated: 4 days ago

how-adhd-presents-in-females-mind-alchemy-mental-health

You’ve always prided yourself on keeping it together.


But lately, it feels like things are slipping through the cracks.


Your mind is constantly buzzing, yet you forget important details.


No matter how hard you try, you wonder why everything feels so overwhelming.


If you’ve ever caught yourself wondering, how ADHD presents in females, you’re not alone.


Let’s break down the most important things you need to know right up front.


Key Takeaways:

  • ADHD in women often looks different: Many women aren't the "hyperactive kid" stereotype. Instead, they may experience chronic overwhelm, forgetfulness, disorganization, or the feeling that their brain is always in overdrive.

  • Signs to watch for: Common signs of adult attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder include trouble focusing, frequent procrastination, losing track of time or items, and difficulty finishing tasks. Emotional sensitivity, anxiety, or perfectionism can also mask or accompany ADHD.

  • ADHD vs. other issues: It’s easy to confuse it with anxiety, depression, or just "being busy." Many women in Denver and across Colorado are first misdiagnosed or told to "stress less," only to later discover ADHD was the missing piece.

  • You’re not “lazy” or broken: If you’re asking yourself how ADHD presents in females, know that it’s a real neurodevelopmental condition — not a character flaw. Understanding this can bring a huge sense of relief and self-compassion.

  • Help is available: Getting a proper evaluation is the first step. As a psychiatric nurse practitioner in Colorado, I help women figure out if they have it through thorough a comprehensive psychiatric evaluation (and even lab tests to rule out other causes). From there, a personalized plan — therapy, lifestyle changes, supplements, or medication — can make a world of difference.

What Is ADHD (and Why Am I Asking About How It Presents in Females)?


ADHD stands for attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder, but don’t let the name fool you. It’s not just about hyperactive little kids who can’t sit still in class. This condition affects adults, too. ADHD starts in childhood, but many women don’t get diagnosed until they’re adults — because it often flies under the radar in girls.


If you’re wondering how ADHD presents in females, it’s probably because you’ve noticed some ongoing struggles in your daily life — like constantly losing track of things, fighting to stay organized, or feeling overwhelmed by tasks that others handle easily. But many women don’t realize these struggles point to ADHD. Instead, you might blame yourself, thinking, "I must not be trying hard enough," or "Maybe I’m just anxious and stressed."


The truth is, ADHD in women often looks different than what we imagine. Women are more likely to have the inattentive type of ADHD (the daydreamy, disorganized kind) rather than the stereotypical hyperactive type. So no, you don’t have to be bouncing off the walls to have ADHD. You could be sitting quietly in a meeting while internally your thoughts are ping-ponging everywhere.


(Quick note: you might hear the term ADD – that’s the old name for one type of ADHD. Today, it’s all just called ADHD.)


In my Colorado psychiatry practice, I meet so many ambitious, capable women who secretly worry something is wrong with them. They say things like, "I have a great job and a good life. So why can’t I just keep my house in order and my calendar straight? Is this how ADHD presents in females?" If you’ve had similar thoughts, it’s worth exploring further.

Why ADHD Often Gets Missed in Women


Here are a few reasons ADHD tends to fly under the radar for women:

  • Mastering the Mask: Women with ADHD often become experts at masking their symptoms to meet the expectations placed on them. You might use color-coded planners, immense effort, or perfectionism to hide your forgetfulness and disorganization. On the outside, you appear so organized — while inside you’re struggling each day not to drop the ball.

  • Misdiagnosis as Anxiety or Depression: Because ADHD symptoms can look like anxiety or depression, many women get those diagnoses instead. For example, you might have been treated for anxiety or depression but still felt something was missing — sometimes ADHD is the missing piece.

  • Later-Life Triggers: Many women only truly notice ADHD when big life changes (like college, motherhood, or menopause) push their long-held coping strategies past the breaking point.


The result? Relief (and maybe a bit of grief) when you finally discover that ADHD is the culprit behind years of struggle. Relief, because now there’s an explanation beyond “I’m just bad at life.” Grief, because you think of how long you silently struggled or were mislabeled.

How to Know if You Have ADHD: 7 Common Signs


By now, you might be mentally tallying up which experiences sound like you. To make it clearer, here’s a checklist of seven common signs of adult ADHD in women:

  1. Chronic Disorganization: Your home, workspace, or car might be cluttered with half-finished projects and random piles of paperwork. Staying organized feels like a never-ending battle.

  2. Forgetfulness: You constantly misplace everyday items (keys, phone, glasses) or walk into a room and forget why you’re there. Important dates, appointments, or deadlines tend to slip your mind despite your best intentions.

  3. Difficulty Finishing Tasks: You have no trouble starting projects, but finishing them is another story. You might jump between emails, laundry, and a work report in the span of 10 minutes. Without a looming deadline (or someone holding you accountable), tasks can remain perpetually “in progress.”

  4. Procrastination and Poor Sense of Time: You often put off tasks until the last possible minute, relying on a burst of panic-fueled energy to get things done. At the same time, you might have time blindness — losing track of time or underestimating how long things actually take. This combo means you frequently run late or feel surprised when the day “gets away” from you.

  5. Restlessness (Mental or Physical): Even if you’re not outwardly hyper, you might feel a motor humming inside. Perhaps your foot is always tapping or you just can’t sit still. And your mind never seems to turn off, even when you want to relax or fall asleep.

  6. Overwhelm and Burnout: Managing day-to-day life can be exhausting. Small tasks pile up into a mountain, and you often feel overwhelmed (and eventually burned out) by what others seem to handle easily.

  7. Impulsive or Emotional Reactions: You might act on impulse — saying or doing things without thinking (like impulse buys or interrupting others because you’re afraid you’ll lose your thought). Emotions can hit hard, too: a minor criticism might feel devastating, or a small setback can send your mood swinging.


Everyone has an “off” day or occasionally procrastinates. What signals ADHD is the frequency and impact of these issues. If you found yourself nodding “yes” to most of the list — and these problems have been tripping you up for as long as you can remember (usually since childhood) — it’s a strong indicator. Remember, ADHD doesn’t just magically appear in adulthood; it was likely always there, only now life has made it more obvious.

It’s Not Just You (and Not Just “Being Lazy”)


One of the hardest parts about suspecting you have ADHD is the nagging self-doubt. You might think: “Everyone has trouble focusing sometimes. Maybe I’m just lazy, or getting older, or juggling too much.”


Let’s bust that myth right now. ADHD is not laziness.


In fact, you might be working incredibly hard just to keep up with what feels easy for others. It’s like running a race with ankle weights on — no wonder you’re exhausted! Many women with ADHD become overachievers or perfectionists, pushing themselves to compensate for the chaos they feel inside. Maybe you even feel like an imposter at times — sure, you look successful and put-together to others, but they don't see how much effort it takes behind the scenes. If you’re chronically burned out from trying so hard, that itself can be a clue.


Also, you’re not alone. Many people (especially women) go undiagnosed with ADHD until adulthood. Every day in my practice I hear women share eerily similar stories: losing keys, zoning out in meetings, and struggling silently despite outward success. When you find out there’s a name for this pattern — adult ADHD — it can be incredibly validating.


(Remember, you’ve been navigating life on hard mode without even realizing it. With the right support, you can turn down the mental chaos and finally feel the steady calm and clarity you’ve been chasing.)

How to Get Diagnosed with ADHD as an Adult


Alright, so you’ve gone through the mental checklist and had a few aha! moments. The only way to truly answer how ADHD presents in females definitively is to get a proper evaluation with a professional, such as a psychologist, psychiatrist, or psychiatric nurse practitioner (like me). Here’s what that process might look like:

  • History & Symptom Review: The clinician will talk with you about your experiences — what challenges you have now and even what you were like as a kid. (ADHD is lifelong, so signs often trace back to childhood.) You might also fill out ADHD symptom questionnaires, and perhaps a partner or parent will provide input as well to give a fuller picture.

  • Focus Testing: Some evaluations include extra tests. For example, in my Denver practice I use QbCheck, a computer-based attention test, to get objective data on focus and impulsivity. These tests aren’t always required, but they can help confirm a diagnosis and establish a baseline.

  • Checking Other Factors: A thorough assessment looks at your overall health, too. We might do lab work to rule out issues like thyroid problems, hormone imbalances, or vitamin deficiencies that could mimic or worsen ADHD symptoms. The goal is to ensure nothing important is overlooked.


After gathering all this information, the provider will determine whether you have adult ADHD. If you do, they’ll explain the diagnosis and work with you on a treatment plan. If not, they’ll discuss what else might be causing your symptoms (maybe anxiety, a sleep issue, etc.). Either way, you’ll come away with a much clearer understanding of why you feel the way you do.

What Happens If You Discover How ADHD Presents in Females Fits You?


First of all, take a deep breath. Give yourself permission to feel whatever comes up — relief, shock, grief, hope. A diagnosis is simply a name for what you’ve been experiencing; it doesn’t change who you are. You’re the same smart, capable person, now armed with new knowledge to help you thrive.


Treating ADHD isn’t about becoming someone you’re not. It’s about getting tools to manage the tough parts and amplify the good parts (yes, there are positives to the ADHD brain — like creativity, curiosity, and resilience). Here are some key components of managing ADHD in a holistic way:

  • Education & Mindset: Understanding how ADHD affects your brain can transform self-blame into self-compassion. Learning about your condition (like what you’re doing now) is empowering and validates that you aren’t “lazy” or broken.

  • Lifestyle Tweaks: Good sleep, exercise, and nutrition are like fuel for your brain. Staying active (easy to do with all the outdoor fun in Colorado!), eating balanced meals, and keeping a consistent bedtime can noticeably improve your focus and mood.

  • Therapy or Coaching: Therapy (or ADHD coaching) helps you build practical skills and coping strategies. You can learn time management techniques, organization hacks, and ways to manage stress and emotions.

  • Medication: For many, ADHD medication is a game-changer. Stimulants or other meds can dramatically boost focus and calm a restless mind. Think of medication as a tool to level the playing field, not a personality changer. The right prescription can help your brain work more efficiently.

  • Holistic Supports: A holistic approach means looking beyond just pills. Nutritional supplements (like omega-3s or iron if you’re deficient) and herbal remedies (like certain adaptogens) might support your brain. I also look at hormone and thyroid health, and even gut health — adjusting these can sometimes reduce brain fog and improve concentration.

  • Community & Support: ADHD can feel isolating, but remember that you’re in good company. Connecting with others — through support groups, group therapy, or online communities — provides encouragement, tips, and a sense of belonging.

Moving Forward: You’ve Got This


If you’ve stuck with me this far, there’s a good chance the question how ADHD presents in females is more than a passing thought for you. Maybe you recognized yourself in these stories. Maybe you feel a mix of relief and concern right now.


Here’s the good news: knowing is empowering. When you identify ADHD as the issue, you can stop blaming yourself for every misstep and start tackling the real problem with compassion and effective tools. Remember, you’ve been in survival mode for a long time — you don’t have to stay there. With proper support, you can finally move from just getting by to truly thriving.

Ready to Find Out and Feel Better?


You don’t have to keep white-knuckling your way through each day, wondering if it’s always going to be this hard. If you’re in Colorado and suspect you might have ADHD (or you have a long-standing diagnosis but need better support), I’m here to help you find answers and relief.


As a psychiatric nurse practitioner who specializes in ADHD and anxiety in women, I believe in providing clear answers and compassionate care. Whether you’re in Denver, Boulder, Colorado Springs, or anywhere in Colorado (telehealth makes it easy), you deserve to feel present, steady, and like yourself again.


During conversations, do you...

  • Listen quietly without interrupting (halo shining).

  • Occasionally interject with excitement.

  • Struggle not to finish others’ sentences or blurt things out

  • Wait, sorry, what was the question? (Got distracted thinking


Now I’d love to hear from you. 

Did any of these signs or stories resonate?

What’s one thing about ADHD in women that surprised you?

Feel free to share your thoughts or questions in the comments — your voice might help another woman realize she’s not alone, too.

 
 
 

Comments


bottom of page